It has been a long time since I updated this site. Since I went back to Malaysia for a while (Apparently the research program begins only on today – and I took the chance to skip today, since I couldn't get a bus ticket earlier anyway), I noticed some events taking place that I would otherwise not notice. Firstly, I noticed I will start ranting about comparisons whenever I go back (It's normal, I guess) and will start noticing stuff that I had not seen by staying either here or there.
Now, I am a resident of neither worlds, not my old one (I had lost touch with it), and not my new one (I had yet to connect to it). This feeling of suspension between dimensions is never comfortable. One sole consolation is probably the fact that I had grown, and am no longer confined by walls of my old comfort zone. Thus, my thinking is free to soar to wherever I wish or bid it to go.
One of the better aspects that I had noticed was the Research Program I am involved in. It helps broadens my horizons, and exposes me to new and ground-breaking technologies. It also gives me a first-hand experience in dabbling with these machines and theories. I guess I have yet to regret taking them up, because they will indeed take up a lot of my time.
Truth be spoken, I do not really know what I want to do right now. Perhaps, being a floating log in the middle of the ocean would not be so bad after all. By chance, I might get to shore. But then again, that might just be me being overly optimistic.
My trip back involved mostly catching up with family and friends. One of the more stinging aspects of my return was that on the exact day of my return, there was a funeral in front of my house. It was a rather turn off, and kind of hints me as to what kind of holiday can I expect this time round. Of course, catching up is rather fun, but I noticed the paradigm shift, and the slow drift of me away from my friends.
All I want now is probably a proper path with only one route down the street, and probably with little lanes that all eventually lead to the same destination. However, so far, I had only been confronted with crossroads that lead to fundamentally different destinations, and these alternatives really test my patience and my own justification for having chosen this alternative in the first place.
Maybe this is what people meant by growing up and leaving your comfort zone. If so, then, I confess I do not really like it.
Shades of Grey 
vic said
not really glad to b the 1st 2 write a comment…
but watever la…
im glad to c tt wings r developed,n everybody try flappin it
yet,its very sad too,friends leavin in all directions
but things r not tt bad,rite???
as u juz said…there r crossroads in life
n who knows???v might b able to meet again
legs r used to move
forward or backward is up to tt piece of thing up on ur head
Andrew Si said
erm….erm….
basically this is the first time i write something about blog in the net….
so ah……feel a little bit stupid, excited though…..
personally i believe everyone has 2 worlds, even me…..
caught between 2 masters is 1 situation 1 should avoid, or else the outcome would KILL ya mentally…..agree ???
well, i know u wanna know more about my 2 world……..hehe, can’t tell dude
somethings r better hidden in the deepest part of our life rather than exposing it……..
anything ! live life as it is @ fight for what u want
cause it’s YOUR life !
so farewell, do strive good i n ur studies, never give up, forget me not !!!
take care …….till we meet again ………………………………………….
akira said
you should feel glad about it, you experienced what we will face in the future. Not everyone have the chance.
Anyway, I love your new theme.